Already Married in Our Hearts

Introduction

Friends, we have been invited here today to share with Groom and Bride a very important moment in their lives. In the years they have been together, their love and understanding of each other has grown and matured. They have faced hardships, changes and a few surprises. (We may add some personal details here.) So, we come together not to mark the start of a relationship but rather to celebrate what already exists between Bride and Groom.

When our love is fresh and new, it’s easy to say, “I’ll always be here.” The true challenge of love and indeed a marriage is seeing the hard times and making it through together. It’s the loving all day, everyday and appreciating the joy that being there for each other can bring.

I like what Wilferd Arlan Peterson said in “The Art of Marriage.”
The little things are the big things. It is never being too old to hold hands, It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once a day. It is never going to bed angry. It is never taking the other for granted; the courtship should not end with the honeymoon, it should continue through all years. It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.

It is standing together facing the world. It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family. It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy. It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways. It is not expecting the husband to wear a halo or the wife to have wings of an angel.

It is not looking for perfection in each other. It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and a sense of humor. It is having the capacity to forgive and forget. It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow. It is finding rooms for the things of spirit. It is a common search for the good and the beautiful. It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal. It is not marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.

Optional Reading Here

Vows

I, Groom, ask you to take me as I am and as I will become. I promise to continue to love you for who you are. With you, my heart is safe to love, my spirit free to grow and my future a brighter place to be. I am proud to call you my wife.

I, Bride, ask you to take me as I am and as I will become. I promise to continue to love you for who you are. With you, my heart is safe to love, my spirit free to grow and my future a brighter place to be. I am proud to call you my husband.

Rings

For thousands of years lovers have exchanged rings as a token of their vows.
These simple gold bands are not of great value in themselves,
but are made precious by our wearing of them. Your rings say that even in your uniqueness you have chosen to be bound together.

Let these rings also be a sign that love has substance as well as soul,
a present as well as a past, and that, despite its occasional sorrows,
love is a circle of happiness, wonder, and delight.

Groom: I begin a new life with you today knowing that we have developed a trust and commitment that is strong enough to last through good times and bad. With this ring, I offer you my hand, my heart, and my soul as I know they will be safe with you.

Bride: I begin a new life with you today knowing that we have developed a trust and commitment that is strong enough to last through good times and bad. With this ring, I offer you my hand, my heart, and my soul as I know they will be safe with you.

Optional Sand or Unity Candle Here

Groom and Bride, although I'm officiating here today,
it is not truly in my power to sanctify, legitimize or bless your relationship in any way, because the two of you have already done that in your hearts.
So, by joining hands right now and looking into each other's eyes, let it be known that you are joined, body and soul in this lifetime, and that this bond is sacred and eternal.

By the laws of the state of Arizona, it gives me gives me great pleasure to pronounce that you are Husband and Wife.

You may kiss the Bride!

Secular